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What if football personalities did The Apprentice? FourFourTwo imagines…

It’s that time of year again: when over-confident clots compete in business battles, as Lord Sugar – scarcely able to conceal his crushing boredom – looks on. Chas Newkey-Burden imagines what would happen if football folk joined the fray...

Harry Kane

The archetypal underestimated candidate. At the start, everyone assumes he’s a bit dim but he turns out to be a shrewd, lethal operator.

Graeme Le Saux

Would be the posh, well-educated candidate who Lord Sugar particularly relishes nailing to the wall in the boardroom.

Arsene Wenger

The Gunners boss would absolutely romp home in the shopping round, when candidates have to buy everything on a list as cheaply as possible.