Vic Reeves and Bob Mortimer invented a character called Judge Nutmeg. He would preside over a game of ‘That’s Justice’ where citizens were tried for random and nonsensical crimes.
The punishments were decided by spinning the Wheel Of Justice. ‘Spin, spin, spin the Wheel of Justice,’ those assembled would chant, ‘see how fast the b*****d turns.’
One imagines IFAB meetings operate on similar lines.
Only a surreal environment could come up with the handball rule as it stands now. Only the comically insane would give the penalty against Eric Dier yesterday.