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Home Sweet Homecoming: A satirical USC vs. Arizona game preview

Maybe Clay Helton isn’t getting fired because USC doesn’t have a full time athletic director.

Maybe Clay Helton isn’t getting fired because the most tenured person on the coaching staff besides him is producing THIS kind of defense.

So far this season, USC’s defense ranks:

102nd in rushing yds allowed
104th in yds per carry allowed
94th in total yds allowed
101st in giving up long scrimmage plays (10+ yds)
93rd in giving up long rushing plays (10+ yds)
80th in allowing 3rd down conversions

— RichSC (@OriginalRichSC) October 13, 2019

This defense couldn’t stop a nosebleed if it had a hospital supply of gauze.