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Which NFL Teams Should Consider Trading for Jadeveon Clowney?

As rumors of a potential Jadeveon Clowney trade swirl, potential suitors for the Pro Bowl defensive end are trying to answer the important questions. Can Clowney help our organization? Can we afford to trade for him? Which of the Texans general-managers-by-committee are we supposed to call? Does that person have the authority to make a deal, or must everyone wait until coach Bill O'Brien is in a good mood? Wait, why is our call going straight to voicemail? No, we don't know our party's extension!

From waiting past the July 15 deadline to sign or trade franchise players (eliminating the sign-and-trade option, which would have made a trade easier and more lucrative for the Texans) to turning their org chart into one of those webs spun by spiders given LSD in a laboratory, O'Brien (who wields the real power in the organization; the electoral college of other executives are just functionaries) and the Texans have irrevocably screwed up the Clowney situation.