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THE TAILGATE: A Graphical Preview of Texas A&M vs. South Carolina

Muschamp hears the dishwasher finish and frantically sprints to open it. His fleshlight is warm and clean for it is game day. His brunch guests are horrified.

"WHAT? CAN'T A MAN CLEAN HIS MISTRESS WITHOUT JUDGEMENT???" he exclaims, kicking over a table.

Muschamp rolls his eyes at the guest, retreats to his room, and cries.

"THEY DON'T UNDERSTAND YOU" Mushcamp whispers into his silicone friend. "THEY DON'T UNDERSTAND US"

The fleshlight becomes a cartoon character, sprouts legs, and begins to talk. You know what part it's talking with, don't make me say it.

"Will, it's OK!