There's a 100% chance of fake news today.
Tired of having games postponed, shortened, and cancelled by inclement weather, the Southeastern Conference has decided to take steps to reduce the chance of rainfall. They have ordered a moratorium on the washing of all team-used vehicles: buses, mowers, equipment trucks, and airplanes.
"Everybody knows it always rains when you wash your car," said the Good Bull Hunting Meteorology Team, probably, in the form of song lyrics or something similar. "There's a 20% chance it might probably work. Maybe 30%."
The Aggies have been cut short by rain twice in the last three weekends now in accordance with SEC rules.