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89 Texas Longhorn Football Players Suspended From Spring Game For Testing Positive for Peeps in Urine Screening

Related Topics: Texas, Peeps, Texas Longhorns

Went to take a leak in Moncrief and this was hanging above the toilet. Tom Herman's attention to detail is real pic.twitter.com/FoAMbkf56K

— Anwar Richardson (@AnwarRichardson) April 11, 2017

AUSTIN, TX-- The Texas Longhorns suffered a major setback on Thursday with the announcement that a vast majority of their team has been suspended from participating in Saturday's Spring Game due to a violation of Coach Tom Herman's Performance Initiative Saturation Syndicate.

"We take P.I.S.S. very seriously around here," the first-year head man said, descending down a waterslide filled with Gatorade wearing an iridescent rubber tuxedo that glimmered white and pale-yellow in the harsh florescent lighting of the press conference area outside Frank Denius Fields.