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Romain Perraud has swapped the mad-cap world of Mario Balotelli in France for the serene south coast and ping pong with Oriol Romeu... but Mexican druglords are helping Southampton's Cup hero learn English (albeit via Netflix!)

Mexican drug lords are helping Romain Perraud master a new tongue. ‘In this moment, I watch Ozark on Netflix,’ the Southampton defender explains. ‘I watch every time in English, with subtitles in French.’

That drama follows a financial adviser laundering money for the cartels. And his move to the sticks.

Aiding Perraud’s rather less perilous relocation are horses and ping pong. Not long after the left back’s £11million summer move from Brest, Perraud challenged Oriol Romeu — one of Saints’ more accomplished table tennis players — to a game. The new kid pushed him close.