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Mariners and Cubs try to out-polite each other, Mariners win, lose

No one knows how to be a human being when they’re first born. There are so many things you need to know how to do, and so many nuances to learn. Everyone must go through rigorous training, colloquially known as “being raised”, to even have a chance at grasping all of the ins and outs required of people, and they still mess up.

When you mess up, and you’re just a kid, it’s generally excusable. At least, sort of. Some adults will glance at you and roll their eyes and maybe let out an exasperated sigh. Others will throw a more blatant glare at your parents, as if to say “how dare you exist with that imperfectly trained small person in my general vicinity.