But that was months ago! Today is now, and now, Manny Machado finds himself $300 million dollars richer after signing with the Philadelphia Phillies. No — wait. Sorry. The New York Yankees. Whoa... ho-ho. Whoops. Sorry again. Looks like the White Sox landed their big fish — nope. That’s not it. The San Diego Padres?
Holy shit.
Baseball’s San Diego Padres have existed in Baseball’s Medium Place for so long that I don’t think fans outside of San Francisco and Los Angeles are even aware of the team’s existence.