Back when the Dallas Cowboys were a legitimate NFL concern, they had a house. It was a five-bedroom house at 115 Dorsett Drive, leased by then-wideout Alvin Harper. Nicknamed “The White House” by Harper’s teammates, it’s where Cowboys of the 1990s went to enjoy the fruits of their labor, mostly in the form of hookers and blow. So many hookers, and so much blow. Michael Irvin kept the entire sex worker industry afloat back in the 1990s, and the majority of his teammates were nearly as benevolent. And who could blame them? These Cowboys won back-to-back titles with Jimmy Johnson, and after losing to the 49ers in the 1994 conference championship game, they turned right around and won a third with Barry Switzer, who himself got s—tfaced the whole week before Dallas won its fifth title.
The Cowboys are dead. Let's dance on their graves.
