1. Let me get this out of the way at the top so I don't get in trouble with SI.com higher ups: Crime is bad and you shouldn't steal and we shouldn't make light of people breaking the law.
OK, now that I got that out of the way, this is a hilarious. Police in Arlington, Texas are looking for a man who they say "went on a textbook beer run." It was textbook because the man decided to steal FIVE cases of beer. The convenicence store he hit, of course, had a surveillance camera going and the still photos from his shenanigans resulted in a great photo.