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They Wiped Out Tom Brady’s Home Town, And Entire County, In The New, Official Super Bowl Poster

Hey, according to this official Super Bowl 50 poster, you can take a cable car from San Francisco to the Super Bowl. How convenient. All aboard for fun!

Except you can’t. And that’s just the first blunder I noticed in this Charles Fazzino Golden Anniversary Super Bowl 50 poster, now available for fans of inaccurate maps and fictional places everywhere. Fazzino has produced op-art Super Bowl maps for the past 15 years, and yes, I realize that it’s not drawn to scale. But some things here are downright Alice-through-the-looking-glass crazy, as if Fazzino ingested psychedelic wild mushrooms from the headlands of Marin before creating it.