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Eric Walden: Throw snowballs at Santa or root for Tom Brady? Somebody hand me my gloves

After all, these are the people who booed and threw snowballs at Santa Claus, who hurled batteries at a baseball player the first time he played a game in Philly after spurning the local team that drafted him, whose history of, shall we say, “uncouth” behavior necessitated a jail and courtroom in the old football stadium.

But please — hold off on the side-eye, cease taking note of my apparently missing ankle monitor, and hear me out before you have security escort me from the premises.

I’m just a man who, as a kid, fell in love with Randall Cunningham’s sidestep-and-leave-you-grasping-at-air elusiveness, and with the “Minister of Defense” Reggie White’s bullrush/“hump” move that left many an opposing quarterback in a politely murdered heap.