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Uefalona, cows, prostitutes and Mourinho's Top 10 excuses

The Man Utd boss has blamed his misfiring players and the lack of video officials for successive draws this week, but it's hardly his first offence

Jose Mourinho just couldn’t let the marginal offside call against Zlatan Ibrahimovic go. Manchester United’s 1-1 draw against Everton featured some of the most directionless football exhibited at Old Trafford in many a year, yet the Portuguese just couldn’t take it on the chin without pointing a finger or two.

"They fought until the last second, and with the VAR we win the game 2-1 because it was not offside. It is difficult for the linesman but I just say when the VAR comes it will help everyone, especially them.