Cultural musicologists have long suspected that in the future, all NFL contracts will be negotiated through rap lyrics, but few understood the frightening speed at which the future was approaching.
The discredited cultural dogma that all rappers want to be ballers and all ballers want to be rappers was, at best, a gross oversimplification, but it makes perfect sense that a baller who indeed is a rapper might bring this new paradigm screaming into the present.
Le’Veon Bell, a Steelers hyper-talented running back, dependable pass-catching option with the expunged record of questionable judgment as LeGarrette Blount’s star-crossed Uber driver, last weekend became the first baller in history to commence contract negotiations in a rap song, and perhaps any song.