A youthful contributor? A veteran presence? A clean-up hitter? A clean-up pitcher? A human-shaped pile of gerbils all scrambling to escape from their flesh prison?
Jeff Francoeur has been drifting around baseball for years, yet is somehow only 31 years old. Can you remember a time when he wasn't on a team? Can anyone? What the hell is he?
I used to be a far more volatile writer/person. That's something I'll say every few years for the rest of my life, but it's also my excuse for at one point writing trash like this:
So, let's take a journey back, and examine the frothy, ignorant word sewer that is Jeff Francoeur's mouth, and the toxic leakage it has spilled in recent memory.