This should really be the space in which we learn that tonight, Maikel Franco and Bryce Harper both hit home runs that brought down satellites. The comms grid for several neighborhoods crashed as a result and South Philly’s natural “hysteria” has been upgraded to “hot-mouthed derangement” by several unverified news sources.
Instead, we have to talk about how Aaron Nola unraveled like a sweater, Edubray Ramos blew the save, and Juan Alvarez put the four finishing touches on another loss to the Nationals that should have been a win.