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Erasing history: Phillies 4, Reds 3

For the first time since 2014, the Phillies held on to win an opening day start.

[much rejoicing]

The best moments of this game were undoubtedly in the early innings. Starter Jeremy Hellickson dealt pitches as if he was dealing punishments to... uh... evil Nazis who need punishment? He was pitching well, okay? That’s all you need to know.

And Hellickson was supported by some early offense. And I do mean EARLY. Cesar Hernandez, who is currently the Phillies lead-off hitter, led off the game with a home run.

You are not hallucinating.