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An Open Letter to Michael Phelps: Let's Think Twice About Your Retirement Plan

Uh, about this retirement thing.

I get it. It's been a long career, most of it spent stroking up and back, over and over again, chasing that long black line on the bottom of the pool. Your workouts make rush-hour traffic look fun, and you've probably swum the equivalent of three or four laps around the equator.

And now you have a fiancee and a son—a true Baby Boomer. Time to stay at home and settle into the life of a normal 31-year-old, whatever that is.

I was with you on this, Michael. I really was.