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Young Matures, A 5-8 Walk-On Bets on Himself, and Bucks Get Everybody's Best Punch

I've railed against Jeopardy! and called for the imprisonment of Alex Trebek for years. You just can't trust people who live and die by a trivia show.

Yesterday, the latest chapter in our country's sordid love affair with academia came to pass. Do these look like people you would invite to sup at your resplendent midwestern hearth?

I understand not everybody on Earth is dumb enough to care about sports. But good lord, that was a $1,000 layup and I wasn't even alive when the Purple People Eaters ate people who were using weaker steroids.