I'm terrified of turnover.
To be fair, I live in a panicky, agitated state at most all times, and sports tends to exacerbate that to an unhealthy degree. But a decade plus writing about Ohio State sports as they're played out on the field has rendered me immune to the petty concerns of puny mortals like yourself, so instead of freaking out in the 3rd quarter of a one possession game against Indiana, I freak out about much more mature, reasoned problems.
Like... everything else.
Greg Mattison is retiring! How dare he?! He's 71 years young with many, many spry years of defensive consistency left ahead of him, but instead the selfish jerk is choosing to spend time with his family (?