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A Disappointing Rebound Game Did Not Bring the Juice to Columbus

Related Topics: Tim Brando, Boo Jackson, Tulsa

Let's talk about Tim Brando.

Well, the whole Fox Sports presentation, really, but Tim Brando was the droningly repetitious symbol of the entire assy experience. The game itself was bad, but made worse by Brando whiffing on every opportunity to make what appeared to be a grainy, upscaled 120p stream even remotely watchable.

Actually, "whiffing" implies that he tried. Swinging and missing is noble on some level, because it shows that you give even a little bit of a shit. Brando didn't even do that, evidently refusing to so much as glance at the roster sheet before the game as he waxed poetic about the one player he seemed to be familiar with (Master Teague, for reasons unknown) and utterly butchered the pronunciations of the players he wasn't (it's "too-ee-moe-low-ow" and "nah-oh-tay-oh-tay," you bum).