So my acupuncturist explains to me that the pain in my elbow is the result of dampness and heat in my spleen and that's why she needs to put a needle on my right earlobe. I pay her $85.00 and as I walk out I notice that her diploma is from an online branch of the Bryman School and that her certificate looks suspiciously like it could fit in the bottom of a Cracker Jacks box. Then again, while my elbow isn't feeling any better today my spleen feels terrific.
The headline is also a send-up to the man we currently miss more than Doolittle, or Crisp, or Zobrist, and that is Ken Korach, whose recovery from knee issues is clearly going slower than hoped.