Sports fandom is inherently silly. Watching people you do not know chase balls up and down fields or courts or regulation handball galleons is pointless. Touchdowns? Pointless. Slam dunks? Wastes of time. Butt bumps? Sophomoric, airborne, gluteal showoffery. Bullpen cars? Only three have ever understood the point of bullpen cars-- Chief Wahoo, who is dead and problematic-- Tommy Lasorda, who has gone mad-- and I, who have forgotten all about it.
The baseball helmet-shaped car taps into the primal fear of hitters, reminding them that all that stands between them and a baseball to the cranium is a thin, plastic helmet, but look there is a larger helmet, and its cruel master is the relief pitcher and he probably has a mustache
Spectator sports are a pointless diversion.
Week 8: It is a Sad Day, When Your Sports Team Loses the Game
