The hot stove appears to be on the fritz this winter, serving up only a few lukewarm morsels to whet our withering appetites. At least it gives us plenty of time for concocting lame metaphors. The offseason's rumors-to-news ratio has been wildly skewed toward the former. Surely, that will change soon, if only because there are dozens of useful veterans still lingering on the open market and there are more than a handful of playoff hopefuls with roster holes still to be plugged. It has to change soon, right?