Are you sitting down? I'll wait.
...
Good, because I have actual news involving the New York Knicks! Per Yahoo's Shams Charania:
Knicks have agreed on deal to sign forward DaJuan Summers, source tells Yahoo. Agent Brian Elfus of Impact confirms Summers, Mitchell deals.
— Shams Charania (@ShamsCharania) September 21, 2015
Precious roster updates! Oh, it's been so long. Who was the last player the Knicks signed? It was Sprewell, right?
DaJuan Summers is a 27-year-old forward and descendant of that long and noble line of NBA DaJuans (and occasionally DeJuans).