The New York Jets and New York Giants’ respective defenses have left much to be desired this season, but even they should be able to stop this one.
A Greenwich Village man, identified as Abdiell Suero, has filed a lawsuit through Manhattan Federal Court against each team, claiming that the East Rutherford, N.J.-situated teams’ “New York” identities (as opposed to the teams’ matching 22-58 records over the last five seasons) have caused “mental and emotional damage, including depression, sadness, and anxiety” to fans.
Suero has thus resolved to obtain $6 billion in damages and has demanded that the teams either move back to New York state by 2025 or rebrand under new monikers that reference their Garden State settings.