Stephon Gilmore's reported restructure paves the way for the Patriots to lock kicker Stephen Gostkowski up for the rest of his career.
Local reaction fell short of unchecked enthusiasm. That's fine. It's a kicker and if Gostkowski wasn't retiring, nobody expected him to go somewhere else.
But for card-carrying members of the We Hate Everything Club, the imminent re-signing of Gostkowski is an opportunity. It's a chance for these runny-nosed pustules to bang their sippy cups on their trays and whine, whine, whine that THIS ISN'T WHAT THEY WANTED!!!
LOOKIT ME!