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Report: the NFL is actually NOT investigating the Patriots for tampering with Antonio Brown

As anyone who grew up with brothers can tell you, this is a tale as old as time: you’re playing Street Fighter or MarioKart or Smash Bros or something (loser gives up the sticks, obviously) and someone is thoroughly getting their ass kicked and then one of you just snaps:

YOU’RE CHEATING!

No, I’m just better than you.

Shut up cheater!

Prove it!

I just know!

So it goes as sure as the sun rises over Dunkin Donuts with the New England Patriots, who are obviously incapable of doing anything cool or fun without breaking all the written and unwritten rules of the NFL at the same time.