It's cute, other sports. The NBA can compete for a while for sheer absurdity. The NFL tries, but fails because it is by design created to stamp every last crinkle and crease of individual out of its participants. (Peyton Manning is basically a talking pressed sheet of aluminum at this point; his greatest concerns in life now is rust and the threat of continued oxidation.) Soccer is really the only serious competitor for total absurdity, even if calling press conferences to deny killing a Ghanaian rapper to perform a human sacrifice is almost cheating.
We say this because yesterday, college football stormed into the party with a sack of oxycontin, a handle of Evan Williams, and eight drunk Marines on shore leave.