NICK SABAN: Ah, another hard day of running America’s most consistently successful college football program. Time for my one scheduled period of relaxation; sitting in the dark and reading only the problem parts of advice columns.
[quietly reading]
SABAN: Heh. These people have problems.
[knock at door]
SABAN: Darnit, I told Locksley to leave me alone when I’m in my special time. [opens door]
LAWYER: Mr. Saban, I represent the interests of the greatest basketball player of all time, and I am suing you for unlicensed appropriation of my client’s intellectual property. You see, my client-
SABAN: Oh, I’d already heard.