The MAC now has a battle flag. This is not a joke: The commissioner wants it flown after any MAC victory, even after MAC-on-MAC violence.
Considering that pirates never really go along anyway, this is fine, though its applications outside the conference feel like they have a lot more potential. Consider a map of territory claimed by the Pirates of the Great Lakes via out-of-conference conquests. Consider that even just using the MAC’s last five out-of-conference upsets against the Power 5 that is it both bigger and simultaneously more obscure than you imagined.
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Anything with that map is either:
- A listing of the last remaining open K-Marts in America
- Exhibit D-20 in the Federal trial of a massive meat and meth smuggling ring
- A visual representation of America’s most toxic but beloved Superfund sites
- Locations of deeply unglamorous mob hits
- “Places I Have Shat Uncomfortably” by Spencer Hall
We need one, is what we’re saying.