To the 32 teams that went home from the NCAA tournament this weekend, leaving championship dreams behind for a long offseason of reflection, reassessment and rebuilding, I want to share these words of solace and encouragement, from the deepest parts of my heart.
First of all, how dare you.
I mean, I trusted you. I believed in you.
Now, let’s be clear about this. I didn’t follow college basketball very closely this season. I mean, I get the broad strokes: that Scion guy’s pretty good, and the usual suspects — Duke, North Carolina, Kentucky, UCLA — are all basically where we expected them to be, but I didn’t watch a lot of regular-season games.