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Alec Blome

Truman Creating Human CentiPorter

"This is only the First Sequence!" claimed University of Missouri mascot and resident evil scientist, Truman the Tiger, after Missouri Basketball landed new assistant coach Michael Porter, Sr. and his uber-talented son, Michael Porter Jr. According to Dr. Truman, the fusing of Porter's - or Porti (poor-tie) - is a revolutionary experiment with radical effects on Missouri basketball performance and season ticket sales. Those with intimate details of Truman's plan have confirmed to Rock M Nation Enquirer what the mascot has already stated publicly: basketball is back in Columbia!