Michigan Football weekends in Ann Arbor are more than singing "The Victors" in the Big House and wondering why they ever got rid of the mens room troughs. Nay, that is only scratching the surface of the many debaucheries you can get into in 
A2 before bowl season rolls around. After those fancy new screens (suck it, poor schools) read zeros, there's a full night ahead of either celebrating in a university-wide bar crawl, or drinking away the day's sorrows, wondering why there is a man playing violin in a werewolf mask outside the bar. Exploring these opportunities is not for the faint of heart, understandably. It is for this reason that we here at Chat Sports took it upon ourselves, as civic duty, to provide you with a beginner's guide to football weekend fun in Ann Arbor. We contracted an undergraduate senior, and he packed up his morals for the weekend to help bring legitimacy to our claims. We found him on the roof the morning after the game, still clutching a bottle of Jack, mumbling the words to "The Gambler" between sighs...
Cover your eyes, Touchdown Jesus.
You wake up on a warm (or freezing), Michigan morning, and roll out of your buddy's disgusting futon bed. After shaking off the bar funk from the night before, the only thing on your mind is the game. Your religion is Michigan Football, your cathedral the Big House, your sacred robes the color maize. Time to start drinking. As is the obvious football law, the best way to prepare for kickoff is to tailgate, whether it's with a few friends grilling in the front yard, pounding frat sodas in a flurry of classy (read: spandex-clad) sorostitutes at a fraternity's pregame, or even with the real people in Crisler's parking lot. 
However, let's assume that none of those are an option right now, for whatever reason. Fear not, you have the bars; you have a reason to be awake and dealing with your hangover this early. Good Time Charley's (Charley's, just Charley's) is the staple college bar of Ann Arbor. Yes, some people will say that Packard Pub is a better pregame spot because of location, but our man on the street says Chuck's. Packard Pub is a good bar, good location, and is packed before games, but Charley's is just... Charley's. Charley's has a lot of great seating inside and outside, with everywhere being in clear view of the many large flatscreens. We asked our specialist to text us that night with how many TV's there were, but we're fairly certain that eleventy-two isn't a number. The staffing is prime, easily some of the best anywhere in Ann Arbor; the waitstaff is fast, and knows its way around the menu to a T, and the bartenders can move a bar fast and efficiently. The drink specials are solid, and they have your favorite pregame beers, guaranteed. If you're feeling adventurous, and it may be better for after the game, but Charley's "fishbowl" Long Islands in a 32oz. mason jar will get you from A to B in a hurry (A being soberiety, and B being the hot girl over there). So stop in early to watch the pregame shows and sauce up a little, or stay here to watch the game if you don't have a ticket - their pizza sticks/ twists are notoriously tasty.
If you decide to grab some food on the way to the game, or for your tailgate, there's a high probability that wings are in the cards. Mr. Spots, 
on State Street between Hill Street and Packard, has been around for 25+ years, and will not disappoint you in the wing department. A fairly small restaurant inside, Mr. Spots does multiple other dishes that are sure to satisfy that pregame craving. Our source claims it may be the only thing that kept his coherent for the remainder of his walk to the game. Some pizza places do wings, some chain restaurants do wings, but Ann Arbor does wings with Mister Spot's, a true wing guru.
Let's assume Michigan wins, as the Wolverines did the day of our... research. The place to go after is a true Ann Arbor institution: Pizza House. Based in AA, pizza house is a behemoth of a restaurant with a huge menu, but we'll stick to pizza. After an afternoon of calling the opposing defense "thugs" and "convicts" after every tackle, hunger is bound to set in. The way to do it right is with the Pizza House classic, the Chicago Stuffed pizza. The movie Inception is actually based off of this pizza within a pizza (citation needed). Pizza House is open until 4am, and serve drinks from a well stocked bar until 2. It goes without saying that if you wanted to end your night in Pizza House, cradling a half eaten pizza, and laden with garlic bread crumbs, you'd have done well. That was not the end for our scientist for hire.
No night out in Ann Arbor is complete without a visit to Rick's American Cafe, and we use the term "cafe" loosely. We use the term "American" very strongly. Rick's 
is your end of the line bar where you go to pound a couple Shark Bowls with friends, and hit the dance floor. Our agent made very clear to us that he doesn't like clubs, and doesn't like dancing, but Rick's is the place to be after dark. Serving from three bars, it's impossible not to indulge in a little bit of ripping shots and taking a fine coed (or bro) to the dance floor in the center to finish the night the right way. Don't get there too late, or you'll get stuck at the end of a line winding around the corner so notoriously, hilariously drunk, that it once warranted it's own live webcam. Our soldier of fortune braved the line with a crew whose size was only described as "rolling deep," and descended the stairs into what was described as the college student version of the Chocolate Room. After a night filled with shameless, hot, loud, facebook-forbidden
activities at Rick's, drunk food was imminent. While Blimpy Burger, a "soup nazi-esque" experience, is a true institution
of the Wolverine State, it's dangerous to assume they'll pander to your drunken rambling. Chosen by this highly scientific study was Quickie Burger, on the corner of Hill and State. A with a wide variety of hunger-killing burgers, our noble hero was quickly talked into a euphoric dish of a double major burger, massive onion rings, and a chocolate malt. And a shot(s) of Jager. And a draft beer - he really just went banana sandwich on our expense account. Full of Burger, the last we heard of our man that night was as he mounted a bicycle taxi, and road off into the sunrise.
Ann Arbor can be more than just football on football Saturdays. We can only hope that this insight can guide you slightly into a successful weekend excursion in the AA. Editor's note: no stomachs were pumped in the making of this article. We think.
If you want to visit any of the amazing places that make Ann Arbor the greatest college town in America, all of their information is listed below.
Location: 1140 South University, Ann Arbor, MI
Phone: 734.668.8411
Location: 808 South State Street, Ann Arbor, MI
Phone: (734) 747-7768
Location: 618 Church Street, Ann Arbor, MI
Phone: (734) 995-5095
Location: 611 Church Street, Ann Arbor, MI
Phone: 734.996.2747
Location: 800 S. State Street, Ann Arbor MI
Phone: 734-222-4555
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