You wake up. Something seems ... off. You can't quite put your finger on it. Oh ... wait, yes you can. The ceiling collapsed over your bed while you were asleep. You are buried under drywall and installation. A cocoon of asbestos envelopes you.
Breaking news: Illinois quarterback Wes Lunt's arms were both devoured by a mountain lion this morning. He is expected to miss the next 4-6 weeks.
You shuffle somberly towards the bathroom to shower and clean the carcinogens off your weary skin. Through no fault of your own, but in fact a clerical error brought to pass by a different summer intern at each utility company (each given the job through the beloved old boys' network), every last one of your utilities has been shut off.