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From the Office of the County Clerk - G105: Astros versus Diamondbacks

Jeremy Hellickson (7-6, 4.60) versus Dallas Keuchel (12-5, 2.32)

We like to publish things with a little bit of irony around here at Astros County. This is The Constable's blog, and he strikes me as a man with a wry sense of humour (as well as long, flowing hair, a flat and muscular abdomen and hands the size of dinner plates). I like to refer to Hank Conger as Hammerin' Hank, which has a certain sense of irony to it (his other nickname is sometimes Handsome Hank, and I will refuse to speculate as to how much irony that nickname draws upon).