It’s the Green Bay Packers’ bye week, and if you’re a smart and loyal Packer fan with some extra cash burning a hole in your wallet, you may have recently become an owner. While you can’t watch Packer football this week, you can take this opportunity to explore one of the biggest perks of Packers stock ownership, the secret shareholder section of the Packers Pro Shop.
While the regular pro shop is full of tacky, gaudy merchandise like “jerseys” and “grilling tools,” the shareholder section is more refined, focusing on “things you could wear while golfing,” “ties that are never appropriate to wear on any occasion where you might need a tie,” and of course, $75 floor mats:
Perfect for anyone who is about to have over their surly Viking fan in-laws for a holiday gathering, this will allow them to work out some aggression as they joyfully wipe their feet on your name, while also letting you brag about your small contribution to public ownership of America’s greatest sports franchise.