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No more excuses for Sergio Garcia at the Masters

AUGUSTA, Ga. -- Golf is the most haunted sport on the planet, and nobody has seen more goblins from tee to green than Sergio Garcia. He has come up with so many conspiracy theories over the years, even Oliver Stone avoids him at cocktail parties. Garcia shouldn't be sponsored by adidas, but by Area 51.

And the helpless victim of all those conspiracy theories? Why, Sergio Garcia of course. Remember the time at the 2002 U.S. Open at Bethpage when he swore USGA officials would've stopped play if Tiger Woods were out there getting drenched instead of poor Sergio?