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What can $45 million guaranteed (after taxes) buy Dez Bryant?

Dallas Cowboys All-Pro wide receiver Dez Bryant recently signed a five-year, $70 million dollar deal. The deal includes $45 million guaranteed and a $20 million signing bonus.

Robert Raiola, a certified public accountant who specializes in sports and entertainment, has pegged Dez’s net income on the guaranteed money after tax to right around $26 million:

$45M=guaranteed portion of Dez Bryant’s deal with #Cowboys. $26M = Approximate $ that Dez will receive after taxes. #NFL #SportsBiz

— Robert Raiola, CPA (@SportsTaxMan) July 15, 2015

Now, as we continue to drool over the possibilities $26 million would provide us, I will break down some possible (but mostly far-fetched) items for Dez’s shopping list:

1.