Romelu Lukaku is starring in a remake of Seven Brides For Seven Brothers. It’s called seven touches for 97 million quid. Just don’t expect a long run.
Lukaku’s involvement for Chelsea at Crystal Palace on Saturday was the most ineffectual since records began. As this was 19 years ago, that’s a pretty lousy game. By half-time, Lukaku had touched the ball once, apart from the obligatory short pass at kick-off. In the second half, he touched it five more times.
Not once did he get on the ball in Palace’s area, and one of his seven interventions was as a defender just outside Chelsea’s six-yard box.