As 2023 winds to a close since the Cubs aren’t gonna do much in the way of transactions anyway, it’s a good time to share this masterpiece from Joey Votto and suggest that they just invite him to spring training for the yuks.
Being a free agent is like that scene from Gravity where Sandra Bullock detaches from the Explorer. You’re all alone, no one is answering your calls, and you don’t know if you’ll get back to base. Your only hope is George Clooney saving you.
Save me, George.