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Future Kyle Schwarber Travels Back in Time to Bear Witness to His Own Awesomeness, Sees Cheapest Double of His Career Instead

It really shouldn’t be a surprise that the Cubs are tied, however loosely, to time travel. After all, there are only about eleventy billion memes about “this is the date from Back to the Future II when Marty McFly sees the report of the Cubs winning the World Series.” Of course, those insipid pictures are slightly more succinct, but I think you get the point.

The concept of going back in time to correct some grievous error is one that appeals to almost everyone, given our innate fallibility. But what if your life was such that, rather than go back to change a mistake, you simply wanted the chance to witness its unadulterated awesomeness as a third party?