SimNews:
The ersatz Cubs meatloafed their way through the weekend, administering a sound thrashing to the digital Blue Jays, who look to be a pretty good team with a couple of glaring issues that the visitors were able to capitalize on. Mainly, this meant a generous helping of bullpen, upon which the simCubs feasted.
Sunday afternoon, to the tune of four long balls, one of which was a grand salami by Albert Almora Jr., two of which were Javier Baez laser blasts, and the first of which was a moral victory by recent callup Brett Phillips, who was inserted into the game when Nico Hoerner couldn’t answer the bell in center, the Cubs played the game like an instrument of torture, dangling the hope of victory briefly before quashing that hope with that bat-around seven-run crescendo.