Greetings from your benevolent dictator of Trade Down Island.
As the calendar turns to April and the NFL Draft draws near, I will dutifully fulfill my role in the coming weeks as the revered, universally beloved leader of my beautiful football-loving island nation. I won last year’s election with 108% of the popular vote to my opponents -8%, so I will take the mandate my people have given me and impose my will for the Carolina Panthers to smartly trade down in the 2025 draft.
I’m writing this brilliant treatise while sitting on the beach, listening to the waves crash, watching dolphins frolic, and sipping on a virgin pina colada served to me by one of my hosts of trained monkey butlers.