The NBA season starts… today! It means real Celtics basketball, real inspiration for real takes with real evidence to back real conclusions. But wait, does that mean I won’t get to make irresponsibly unsubstantiated projections about how the season is going to go anymore?! Oh god…uh, quick! Grab the keys to the nuclear codes and launch every crazy take-missile we have in reserve!
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1. Jayson Tatum is going to have comfortably the best season of his career
Schematically, I have no reason to believe this.