The ODB team was as appalled by Matthew Mayer’s very on purpose knee to Tanner Groves’ face as the rest of the nation was…sike.
To pay homage to the absurdity that was the ESPN+ crew and all of OU twitter’s reaction to an inadvertent knee to the face, the ODB team decided to tell the tale of KneeGate. The infamous story that will go down in NCAAM Basketball lore.
Below are a series of thoughtful and heartfelt poems, we hope you enjoy.
“Ye olde Matt Mayer Time”
Branden MacKinnon
There once was a man named Matt Mayer
He had springs in his legs, a high flyer
He jumped in the lane for a rebound
A caveman’s head his knee found
The state of Oklahoma was shook
The replay officials took another look
The ruling was that contact was incidental
Had the ESPN announcers temperamental
The Bears went on Drews patented run
Annihilating the Sooners, such fun
“Groves meets Mayer, in Iambic Tetrameter”
Cody Orr
Forward Tanner Groves took a knee
From Matt Mayer, he could not see
Groves b*tched to the ref, got a T
And Baylor Bears won by fourteen
“The Bended Knee”
Noelle Kakimoto
Chestnut hairs sealed his eyes from their milky limbs whipping through the air
One step, two toward the apricot orb leaping between twenty hands
Mayer surged among the plenty, many men reaching for the same amber award
A bended knee to Grover’s head extended one second
The Sooner’s bitter tongue shrieking at the striped
His technicality bearing the Bears’ winning destiny
“Kneedle”
Joe Goodman
Groves face hit a knee
Mayer flew into his head
Announcers appalled
“The ODB Knee”
Deonte Epps
We at ODB
Saw a connect from head to knee
Mayer did it yeah we saw
BU got the dub, that is all
“A Matthew Mayer Sea Shanty” to the tune of The Wellerman
Peter Pope
There once was a ship that put to sea
The name of the ship was Mathew Mayer’s Knee
When Groves looked up, the Knee went down
Oh blow the announcers did bloooow
Soon may the Mullet Man come
To bring us free throws and threes and fun
One day when the kneeing is done
They’ll take their L’s and go!