Never has a baseball franchise been more of a joke than the Washington Nationals. They totally suck. Let me count the ways.
The Washington Nationals are an invasive, parasitic species. They are the emerald ash borer of baseball teams. Just like that pesky insect, they have come to this area from a foreign land due to a careless mistake, unwanted by anyone, and if left unchecked, they will eventually destroy everything that is green and beautiful in the Baltimore region.
The Washington Nationals are a stain on the baseball landscape. They are quite literally a stain, what with their absurd habit of unleashing a post-game chocolate syrup shower on anyone who happens to be getting interviewed on the field.