Mauricio Pochettino’s self-imposed punishment for having to sit in the stands here is to take his squad out for dinner. He should make his Chelsea players wash the dishes after this error-strewn defeat.
Never mind the touchline, they could have done with their manager at the heart of the defence. Those at the back made Rishi Sunak look like a competent tradesman, after the Prime Minister’s ham-fisted use of a hammer this week.
Pochettino must have felt like taking a hammer to the dressing-room wall afterwards. It would certainly have shown more resistance than his team, whose skipper Reece James stupidly got himself sent off and most experienced player, Thiago Silva, gifted Newcastle a game-clinching third goal.